Richie Brown
Writer, alleged humourist, former poet, slacker
WHAT'S NEW?
Gnu Shoes
Step into the unpredictable world of our Mr. Brown's shoe shopping trip! Desperate for new footwear, he encounters a peculiar shop and its extraordinarily persistent wildebeest proprietor. This determined gnu, convinced he has the perfect pair, employs increasingly desperate sales tactics, resorting to truly outlandish, hoof-splitting lengths to close the deal. Originally published in Donut Factory magazine, this wild and witty tale explores unexpected encounters and the ridiculous side of retail.
How did that gobshite get on the telly?
Richie Brown's hilarious, self-deprecating take on his BBC Scotland TV interview for Granite Noir, recalling awkward moments and a past ITV appearance.
Frank: an Obituary
Richie Brown's heartfelt obituary for his beloved ginger cat, Frank. A loving tribute to their shared life, adventures, and the profound bond of pet companionship.
Psychedelic Shortbread at Granite Noir
How my "Psychedelic Shortbread" story opened an event at Granite Noir 2025, sharing the stage with top crime writers and their band, Fun Lovin' Crime Writers.
Christmas with the Cromwells
Experience a chaotic 1653 Christmas with Oliver Cromwell. A strict holiday is hilariously disrupted by an unexpected feast and, in particular, a suckling pig!
The Christmas Cake
A witty poem from a Christmas cake's perspective, detailing its creation with brandy and fruit, and its humorous, slightly sad journey through the festive season to the bin.